Hi it's a wonderful weekend i notice some crocus and narcissus having its beautiful blooms. My amaryllis still alive one more blooms coming up. Well i guess you would like to read more about what's going on, right now i would like to talk about my grandpa. But anyway i would like to learn more about my grandpa and would like to learn their costume and tradition. It's not too late for me to see what's in store actually i started looking at some Turkish jewelries makes me happy, learning grandpa's real identity helps me understand who i'am. That's my aim right now to search more about him. This makes me happy learning more and solving the puzzle that was hidden for a long period of time. My dad never said anything about grandpa he never talk about grandma either. Once again i never had a long conversation with my dad before he never ever talk about his brothers or sisters or cousins. So anyway i have to put all the puzzles together and have my aunt help me understand why this happened. I remember there's a family reunion invitation when i was in high school but because of distance and work my dad never ask or talk about going to this reunion, my mother is speechless. The gathering begins and the reality comes when my dad pass away. Looking at the old family picture unlocked my grandpa's real identity by listening to my aunts story, this is where it begins i would like to know more about my grandpa.
So if anyone of you had a dad like my dad who never said anything about your grandpa, grandma, about his sisters and brothers start asking right now, now is the right time to do it, don't wait. Now is the right time to put all the puzzles together and have peace of mind knowing all your family members is very important.
Well i guess this is it for today i will talk to you again, take care.          

T'was a beautiful morning looking of today not able to see my dad anymore. Just looking at my dad's photo this will help me all the way knowing that he is in a better place. A place where you can't see pain and sorrow. This moment of quietness i give up fear and worries because i know my dad is happy and glad to be where he is right now. My tears drop little by little with joy giving up my sadness and grieve because i know my dad is with the almighty.


I love you dear dad once again we will miss you....

Tomorrow will be the burial day of my dear dad and i was looking at the old family picture. I see my dad a good looking dad of course i see my grandma she's a pure igorota (my beautiful grandma) from the province of Bauko Philippines, my grandpa is pure Turkish tall and good looking grandpa makes me wonder why i didn't even bother to wear Turkish fashion but i will now. I will find jewelries that will highlight my Turkish identity lol. As of now i have to take it easy my dad's youngest sister (her name is Maria) was funny she like stories, riddle. Yes one of the tradition they have to follow all the old folks came to sing for my dad (folk songs) after singing they exchange stories and riddle so beautiful i will share if my aunt allows me. Life is beautiful but this is it for my dad, this is the given time for him to go i will miss you dear dad...i love you.    

essair.blogger.com: essair.blogger.com: I like to watch S-Korean drama...

essair.blogger.com: essair.blogger.com: I like to watch S-Korean drama...: essair.blogger.com: I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however ... : I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however this celebrity...

To my sister in-law, thanks to you. I know you provided 24 hours care for my dad til his last days. You are a wonderful sister God Bless You.


To all my cousins/relatives in Bauko thanks for coming, my hug and kisses to auntie Maria and family.


Thanks to all who came and thanks for your prayers.

My Thursday went OK however my phone keeps on ringing at two o'clock in the morning til five. I'm trying to get up but I can't my body is aching from three days cleaning the house and yard work. Makes me wonder why I'm receiving calls that early, with curiosity I opened my computer to see if there's something I need to know, seriously. I did listen to messages via my phone I heard my niece talking two of my nieces send me messages. Yah I heard it clearly that my dad pass away peacefully. Though I don't have long conversations with my dad since my young age. We don't talk that much he works most of the time I remember he was away from us most of the time, mother worries sometimes caring for all of us (six children) plus my mother was pregnant that time. It was a hard journey to take if you're in that situation however everybody has their own life story. Anyways I'm prepared to accept what's next I did everything to help my dad not physically but financially. My dad suffered from stroke he was paralyzed (half body) due to delayed intervention he can only makes unsounded consonant he is like a deaf mute person. My dad was alcoholic and smoke tobacco I remember when I was young I see my dad drunk sleeping in the couch with a loud snoring. My dad works so hard as a miner in a place called diamond drilling, Philix mines in the Philippines. My dad receives pension and support from his SS as he went through with his medical treatment my sister in-law, mother, nieces and nephews help each other for the care of my dad while he was still alive we give all what we can till his last days. Thank you for your help especially to my sister in-law but there's nothing I can do right now but to say goodbye dad we will miss you.


Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in him,
for he shields him all day long, and the one the 
Lord loves rest between his shoulders.     Deuteronomy 33:12      

Hello everybody sorry didn't talk to you for a week however here I'am to wake you up or keep you awake. Lots of work today not fun at all. By the way Happy Valentine's Day I hope everybody had a great heart day not heartache. I didn't eat my dinner yet but I will I'm sure you want to know what's going on with Alona. Yeah she is admitted at the hospital for observation psychiatric and for psychiatric medication reevaluation. Did I say it right? I'm glad her mother finally decided well to send Alona to the hospital she is the legal guardian of Alona so she can make everything happen. Alona's symptoms is not funny anymore lots of anger breaking, hitting, knocking and throwing things on the floor and plus she comes for cigarette every 15 minutes and comes for more. Alona becomes agitated and manic however I respect confidentiality so I have no intention to write longer than what I want it to be but I'm glad and happy to say that I like my work. I'm sure you like what you're doing too, because if you don't then you can't see the reality of what's in it. If you can see it then the solution is easy. So long I have to sign off now talk to you again. Good night 

Beautiful day here in my state, maybe I might go downtown and do a little shopping. Wonderful day...Alona will be with her sister later this afternoon for an outing.Nothing much to do this day but paper works. About Alona she will be moving out the end of this month. Might be a place where she can find more rules, no extras given period. I can see the picture already but yeah..it will be tough but, it will help Alona with her cigarette addiction. I cannot tell you if this changes or new windows works for Alona..might be or might not...anyways I have to sign off I need to work with my paper works...talk to you again...take care.   

essair.blogger.com: I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however ...

essair.blogger.com: I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however ...: I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however this celebrity suicide victims in S-Korea really shocked me. They're all talented and beau...

I like to watch S-Korean drama and movies however this celebrity suicide victims in S-Korea really shocked me(I saw this video via You Tube). They're all talented and beautiful celebrities but why are they victims of suicide. I would like to help by sharing a word just words that will help you treasure "life." To all celebrities in S-Korea I like watching your drama and movies and also globally people are watching what you have..so please, please continually show what you have and make effort to love "life" because life is precious. Loving yourself means you care about yourself, don't allow yourself to be a victim of defeat be strong and enjoy what you're doing, love yourself, don't be tempted with too much vices but see the bright side also not only the dark side of life. If your reason is about family issues or other issues those are just normal issues in life that we people can overcome if we become strong enough to face it and work for the answer or solution. There is always second chances, so please do well and wake up to the reality that you are born to shine, to be alive and see the beauty of who you are. Don't let yourself down be the first to say "I love being me" you are amazing, speak and loudly say "I made it." And when you made it you will be amaze with the talent that you have shared globally. Take care everybody..GOD BLESS. 

Caring for people who are helpless physically and mentally that's what I do...living with them is not really that easy if you're not that kind of person to deal with it. My grandma I didn't even had a chance to see her when she pass away. If you are providing care to one of your family who needs it, so be it. It will take 24 hours to do that and if you're not ready don't do it. Take the first step before doing it, take good care of yourself before caring for others. Good luck share what's new..talk to you again.

Take care

Bring me something to eat I miss "pinakbet" right now I'm eating "crispy eggplant" really good, I eat this as a side dish, good for snacking, appetizers whatever you want it. I have to make "Lemon-Salmon with Veggie Saute" serve with hot cooked rice..what do you think. 


Now..about Alona she's doing well finally she's doing well today, I can see her smiling and at least she's quiet today. Went out with Celyne for her outdoor activity. That will help her a lot how I wish she can continually doing well at this level, amazing. However nothing's easy for me at this time I need to quadruple my patience and make sure it's worth doing it. This year if I can see any better than what I'm doing at this time I will take the opportunity to try what else is worth doing...if that opportunity comes I will take it and see what's in it...well I have to sign off now, tomorrow again....take care.